While we're on the subject of dumb kids...

...in Chinese school there was this sixth grader named Sunny. What's sad is that he's actually a pretty smart kid, but he decided to become this dumb douche. His favorite insult? Yo momma jokes. Yeah. :I

One day he said in this cocky voice, "My mom had a master's degree!"

I said, "That's nice."

"Did your mom get a master's degree?"

"No."

"Hah! Your mom didn't get a master's degree and mine did!"

I restrained the urge to slap him. Respectable eighth graders don't slap ignorant sixth graders. "So?"

"It means that I'm more likely to get a master's degree than you!"

WHAT A FUCKING DUMBASS. I FELT SO PISSED. SO I DELIVERED THIS ULTIMATE SMACKDOWN. "Are you sure your name is Sunny? Because you don't seem too bright."

He gave me this totally bewildered look, because shots had been fired right then and there. "...Yo momma has diarrhea!" he declared.

I wasn't done with him yet. "So? Diarrhea is a medical condition, it's not a subject of shame or mockery-"

"Shut up, dictionary."

"I think the more precise term is 'encyclopedia'."

Then I had the final laugh when I got a better report card than he did.